Saying Goodbye Doesn’t have to be Hard


Writing a eulogy for a friend or family member is an honor and one of the most difficult tasks that will ever be asked of you. It’s an honor because loved ones know you will tell the real story of their family, and it’s hard because how do you sum up a person’s life in a short funeral speech?

One of the first things you want to do is brainstorm all the your ideas, and then put them into categories. Then make sure you use specific examples and anecdotes to tell the story. For example, my father-in-law always made everyone’s birthday cakes. That tidbit had to be included in the eulogy or I would’ve let the family down.

Once you have determined all that needs to be included in the eulogy, begin writing, and write as you speak. Don’t try to be all formal and perfect. Family members need to hear your voice tell a story. They don’t need or want a perfect essay read to them. They want memories and the true voice of the deceased and you. You have been chosen for this presentation because you were close to the deceased and the family knows you will tell the story.

Use this opportunity to pay tribute to someone you and they have loved. This is your opportunity to say that final goodbye with stories, passion, maybe a little connection to scripture, and most of all reality.

Don’t let this opportunity make you nervous. In fact, it’s cathartic because most likely you are also saying goodbye to someone you love. Let the stories and truth flow, and you will comfort the grieving and you will give final peace to all who hear the sweet words you present at a very sad time.

No one should waste this honor of giving a funeral speech to a loved one. Tremendous effort is expected to be heard from your speech. Though it’s not that always simple, you can find some guidelines into writing a great funeral discourse at